Stop Signs for Groups

I’ve been helping a group work through some conflict.  It occurs to me that a four way stop provides some lessons for how groups should operate…

Think about it: When the drivers at a four way stop are behaving as they should, it’s a model of beautiful efficency.  First off, the cars have to stop, pause, and take note of current conditions.  Each car gets a turn to go, in an agreed upon order arrived at by mutual understanding of purpose.  Sometimes, a driver who’s having a good day will wave another driver on ahead of them, allowing the other driver to go out of turn.  The result is that we get where we’re going.

But when there is a lack of understanding or consideration, things don’t work so well at the four way:  Some drivers seem lost about whose turn it is, the result being lurches, start-n-stops, a breakdown in the travel process.  That’s when the exasperated horn blowing or finger waving starts.  A driver who completely disregards the sign puts themselves and others in danger.

Groups function best when there is a mutual, agreed upon understanding of the group’s purpose… when group members treat each other with respect and consideration, and occasionally let one of the other people “go ahead”… when we take time to pause and reassess current conditions.

The “one anothers” of Scripture are still the best ground rules anytime more than one person is involved in anything worthwhile.

And yeah, I’m pretty sure ”the four-way stop” won’t replace “Forming – Storming – Norming – Performing” anytime soon, but it might just improve group life and effectiveness.

 

Something’s Wrong Somewhere…

Current studies indicate the average pastor stays at a church 22 months.

50% of pastor’s marriages will end in divorce.

Only 5% of those who enter the ministry will retire from it.

Dire figures that indicate something is tragically wrong somewhere.

If a church is burning through a minister every 2 or 3 years, or a pastor has to pack up and move to another church every 22 months… well, I’m reminded of the Tim Wilson song, “100 Things To Remember,” in which he says, “If you’ve been married 9 times, it might be you…”

I believe for any number of reasons a church can enter a death spiral – there’s an ugly situation or a separation, and the pastor leaves.  The whispers and questions result in a lesser quality of applicants for the open position. Let this happen a couple of times in a decade and the church becomes known as a “preacher eater.” By that time the only resumes they will get are from the very shallow end of the pool. And the cycle continues.

A pastor can also get enmeshed in a similar downward spiral – they leave a church under a cloud (their fault or others, doesn’t really matter) – and the next ministry is at a church that’s a teeny bit less healthy. As above, this happens a couple of times in a pastor’s career and the only positions left open to them are the largely hopeless ones.

When a church in the death spiral and a pastor in his own personal death spiral hook up, it can get incredibly ugly… There’s potential for it to become the sort of thing that makes people walk away not just from the church but also from their faith.

I realize this is too descriptive and not prescriptive at all, but I don’t think the answers will come easily or that there is any simple solution.

One thing has come to mind as I’ve thought about this today: The need to return to the relational, organic nature of the church.  When org charts and systems and CEO’s are the order of the day, we shouldn’t be surprised when an “employer/employee” mindset takes hold.

I wonder what you think…

Sunday Replay 04.27.08

Our lovely Spring sucker-punched us!  But the cool temps eventually gave way to a pretty nice day.

In the house, we concluded our Homerun! message series.  Looking back at the Old Testament story of the Battle of Jericho, we saw that our extraordinary God uses very ordinary people to accomplish His amazing plans.  It was a strong “vision” message, one that challenged us to recognize that God can use us and He will use us more and more as we make ourselves available to Him.

Someone recently asked me if I was discouraged with our progress…  My immediate, heartfelt response was, “Absolutely not!”  I have never been more excited about our church and our future than I am right now.  I truly believe we will see walls fall down in our community because of our church’s ministry. 

Some of you might have thought I was crazy yesterday – I was casting some “scary” vision – but I really do believe we will see that Habitat house built by our people…  We will see incredible acts of service that will re-shape our community’s physical, emotional, and spiritual landscape…  We will see thousands of people who are far from God people come near to Him… Looking backward from the vantage point of Eternity, I believe we will see these days as pivotal to our transition to being a more externally focused, Kingdom purposed church.

There’s so much going on, I’ll just quickly mention:  Love and Respect marriage seminar… Bible Beach Club… Irresistible Evangelism on Wednesday nights… Worship Guitar class starts soon (and more music instruction will follow)… July 4th outreach… bottled water and popsicles at the County Fair…

To all those who work in volunteer ministry, I say “Thanks so much, we couldn’t do this without you!”  To those who are still thinking it over, or “sitting it out,” I say, in love, “Get off the bench and into the game!  You will be amazed at how much our extraordinary God can accomplish through you!”

Have a fantastic week!

Random Ramble… Evangelism

I’ve been reading and studying a lot about evangelism these days, preparing to facilitate the “Irresistible Evangelism” course on Wednesday nights (Jubilee people, you really ought to be here for that course – it’s going to be great!).

 

Here are a few somewhat random thoughts, while I’m on the subject…

I think I first heard about “levels of receptivity” from Thom Rainer.  The concept is that unchurched/unsaved people can generally be grouped into five categories:

• U5 – Highly Resistant: antagonistic and even hostile to the gospel
• U4 – Resistant to the gospel, but with no antagonistic attitude
• U3 – Neutral, with no clear signs of being interested yet perhaps being open to discussion
• U2 – Receptive to the gospel and church
• U1 – Highly receptive to hearing and believing the Good News

As to how many people might occupy each category, I theorize that the numbers would fall along a classic bell curve:

Here’s what struck me as I pondered all that… Almost every evangelism script, formula, presentation, program, etc., that we’ve ever tried to use is focused almost exclusively on the U1 and U2 end of the curve – the most receptive people.  It troubles me that the folks on the other end of that curve die and go to hell, and yet we persist in methods that basically ignore them.

I submit that Servant Evangelism will make a substantial impact – and is more likely than almost anything else to nudge a person from Highly Resistant toward Neutral or Receptive territory.

That being said, I’m becoming more and more convinced that no single method is the “only right way” to do evangelism (Sorry about that, WOTM groupies).  God has always used a variety of ways and means to draw people to Himself through His servant-followers.  Some ways are undoubtedly more effective than others (I’m still waiting to meet someone who was saved by  “urinal outreach” – not saying that person isn’t out there, I just haven’t met them).

It’s probably an apocryphal story, but – and I’m paraphrasing here - a man approached legendary evangelist Dwight L. Moody and said, “Moody, I don’t like your methods of evangelism.”  Moody replied, “Well, I’m not completely sold on them myself.  Tell me about yours.”  The man said, “Why, I don’t have any!”  To which Moody replied, “Then I like mine better than yours.”  The barren are the loudest critics of the fruitful.

Finally, you might have noticed I’ve added Chris Walker to my blogroll.  Chris’ website is called “EvangelismCoach.org” and it is a fantastic resource.  Lots of great ideas, news, and discussion of evangelism.  Check it out!

Everyone have a great weekend!

Every 15 Minutes…

Today I participated for the first time in the Every 15 Minutes program – a simulation event to raise awareness of the fact that a person dies in an alcohol related accident every 15 minutes.

The day began at the local high school.  A “Grim Reaper” went into classrooms and brought out a student every 15 minutes throughout the morning.  After a student was removed from class, their obituary was read by a law enforcement officer and posted in the classroom.  The student became one of the “Living Dead” and was not allowed to speak or interact with others for the rest of the school day.  Uniformed officers and local ministers made death notifications during the morning, informing parents at their homes or workplaces of the death of their child.

After lunch the student body assembled outside to witness an accident scene.  Two crashed vehicles carrying five bleeding, injured students made for a very grim picture.  One of the students was the drunk driver, and another was taken to the hospital by ambulance – and later died there.  One of the students was taken by helicopter to a larger hospital, and the other two were declared dead at the scene by the local coroner.  The bodies of those students were put into bags, and the parents were brought in to identify their children.

As a parent and a pastor, it was an emotional day.  I made death notifications and it was interesting to watch the reactions of parents.  Even though they knew it was a simulation – participating parents and students go through an extensive training during the weeks leading up to the event – many were still overwhelmed when “the word” came.  One parent said, “When you see a pastor and a state trooper at your door, the dread begins to build, it’s uncontrollable.”

I also assisted one of the couples who had to identify their dead child at the accident scene.  The image of a mother holding and kissing a child who is lying in a body bag is not one I will soon forget.

I managed to keep it together through the day – the pastors and officers had some down time to shoot the breeze and we were fed well.  But on the drive from the high school to my office, I, quite frankly, lost it.  I was sobbing by the time I got to my office, and struggled to describe my day over the phone to my wife.  I simulated things today as a pastor that I hope I never have to do in “real life.”  As a parent, I heard words and spoke words to others that I pray I never have to hear about one of my own.

I will hug my boys tightly tonight, and thank God for their lives and their faith in Him.

Tomorrow there will be a convocation, the “dead” and their parents will speak about their experience.  I’m so appreciative of the law enforcement officers, fire, ambulance, and rescue personnel, the high school teachers and administrators, and the pastors who invested their time in this outstanding program.

Sunday Replay 4.20.08

The predicted rain missed us and we had a beautiful day!  And it was beautiful in the house too.   Worship was incredible!  Our special guest, Lyn Westafer did an outstanding job leading worship and singing for us this morning.  It was great to meet Lyn and her husband Bill, and I had tons of people comment on how much they enjoyed worship today.  I think the worship team enjoyed the day off, too.

The third message in our series, “Homerun! Knocking Life Out of the Park,” focused on Jesus’ prayer found in Luke 22:42, “Father, if You are willing, remove this cup from Me; yet not My will, but Yours be done.”  We saw in that prayer the assurances we have that God is close enough to hear us, powerful enough to act on our behalf, and faithful enough for us to trust.  We were challenged to pray every day, “Not my will, but Yours be done.”

There are many exciting things coming up: 

• “How to Play Worship Guitar” class is forming, and will be starting soon.  Whether you’re a beginner who’s always wanted to play or a grizzled veteran of the frets, you will learn what you need to play praise and worship music.  Cost is $25, and you need a guitar – preferably acoustic.
• We’ve started taking paper registrations for the “Love and Respect” video conference on May 10th.  Hopefully this week we’ll have the online registration glitches worked out, please bear with us.  
• In the next two weeks, we begin serious preparation for Bible Beach Club – our annual opportunity to spend a week in ministry to 100+ kids from our community.  Flyers will go out to kids at Carroll Elementary the week of May 12th.  We will also have online registration for the first time this year.  BBC is June 16-20.
• This one is still a little ways off, but we will host a Community Cookout and Bluegrass Festival on July 4th.  We always have tons of people who park in our lot to watch the community fireworks show – this year we’re going to bless them and minister to them with free food and good music.  Watch for upcoming information on how you can get involved.

Have a great week!

“I feel the earth… move… under my feet…”

Our family experienced our first earthquake this morning about 5:30 AM!  The actual quake was about 150 miles or so away, but we had a wild ride all the same.  I’ve heard from folks this morning who live in the Cincinnati area and in West Virginia who felt it, too.

Vic and I woke up at the same time sensing that something wasn’t right… The ceiling fan was rattling and rocking back and forth, and the hardware on a dressing was tinkling.  Vic asked, “What is it? An earthquake?”  and I replied, “I think so.”  And we both promptly went back to sleep.

Upstairs, Nick, our 13 year old, woke up to trophies and other stuff falling off of shelves.  15 year old Sam jumped out of bed, afraid – in his words “that something demonic was going on!”  Sam said the house felt like it was moving back and forth.  He said he didn’t know what to do, so he jumped back in bed and “started praying.”

But get this: The other four people in the house slept right through the entire thing.

And the best part?  It’s got “sermon illustration” written all over it.  Yeah, baby!

 

Levels of Evangelism

What follows is a five year “work in progress.”  I began looking for a continuum of sorts that would help believers identify where they stand in the ministry of evangelism, and where they could go, if they were willing to be equipped and step out in faith.

Some of the content undoubtedly got into my head through my reading and listening to good teachers.  I would gladly attribute if I could remember who said what, but I can’t – so I’ll just release any claim to originality.

5 Levels of Evangelism

Level 1: “Seeking” 

Simply put, it’s living the Christian life.  The L1 believer is a good neighbor, worker, and friend.  They invite people to church when they find out a person doesn’t go, but their efforts rarely reach beyond.  Potentially, 100% of Christians fit in this category.

Level 2: “Showing”

L2 believers commit themselves to lifestyle/friendship evangelism.  They intentionally form relationships and live out neighborly kindness that can lead to conversations about spiritual things.  They are prepared to tell how God has made a difference in their lives, a.k.a. “sharing a testimony.”  About 75% of Christians can operate comfortably at this level.

Level 3: “Serving”

The L3 believer shows the love of Christ in practical ways.  They actively participate in servant outreach and evangelism.  They wash cars, hand out free Cokes, pick up trash, build wheelchair ramps. They can share their testimony and the gist of the scriptural truth about salvation.  Roughly  50% of believers could live at this level.

Level 4: “Sharing”

L4 believers are the spiritually gifted evangelists.  They can share the Gospel from Scripture with confidence.  They’re sensitive to the Spirit’s leading in witnessing.   About 25% of Christians could fit this level.

Level 5: “Shaping”

L5 believers are the disciple-makers.  They are gifted at sharing the Gospel and equipping believers to reach others.  Probably only about 10% of Christians could maintain this level.

A couple of notes…

• The levels only indicate position on the continuum, not quality.  I believe it’s important to expand our understanding of what evangelism is and affirm those believers at every level, while at the same time casting a vision for advancing.
• The percentages are best case scenarios, not the numbers the Body of Christ is currently hitting.  I believe if we did hit those numbers, hundreds of thousands (millions?) of people would be brought near to God.
• I acknowledge some overlap between categories.  Some number of believers could straddle a couple of levels comfortably, and I would speculate that would be most likely to occur as one moves up the levels.
• With training and good models, the vast majority of believers could advance to higher levels.

So, am I on to something here, or have I totally stripped a gear?  I look forward to your thoughts.

When Someone Takes a Shot…

I think it was Stan Toler who came up with the idea that he had received enough “constructive criticism” to build a mansion.

Simply put, leaders are going to be criticized.  This is especially true in ministry leadership.  For some bizarre reason, everybody feels like it’s o.k. to pop a shot at the pastor from time to time…

So, here are my current strategies for handling criticism and critics: 

• If they love Jesus and love me, I’m open to listening.  If they don’t, sorry, but don’t waste my time or yours.  That way I don’t have to worry about what some pious gasbag in the congregation across town thinks of me or my church.
• I don’t listen to “some feel” or “others are saying” type of stuff.  If you can’t give me a name, one of two things must be true: Either it’s made up or it’s you.
• And let’s make sure we know this – anytime we decide to move forward for God, there WILL be criticism.  We will be talked about, questioned, and even misrepresented to others.  Jesus said we should rejoice in such things…  Seems odd, but that critique might be the proof that what we’re doing is right.
• If an accusation is really weighing on me, I’ll find one, or at the most two, other trusted Christians and ask them, “What do you think?.”  I ask them to pray with me and for me to help me grasp what I should do next.
• Finally, I try to never let the potential for criticism paralyze me into inaction.  If we decide to take no action until we’re assured no one will squawk, we will never do anything!

 

Sunday Replay 04.13.08

It’s been a very busy couple of days – that’s why the Sunday Replay is going out on Tuesday!  Well, that and I couldn’t manage to get connected to the Internet from my hotel room in Nashville Sunday night…

We had another great day!  I appreciate what the worship team had to go through to prepare to lead us into His presence.  Anya and Chris had to battle car trouble and a long trip just to make it back for Sunday, and we’re glad they’re home safe and sound.  Question:  Is Josh’s official title now “Egg-Shaker-Thingee Guy?”

Our second message in the “Homerun!” series looked at the arrest, imprisonment, and release of Peter and John in Acts chapter 4.  We zeroed in on what each of us needs in the Body of Christ.  We saw that we need a place where we can: 1) Be real, genuine about what’s going on in our lives; 2) Be reminded that God is bigger and more powerful than our problems; 3) Be held accountable for submitting to the truth of God’s Word, and living The Life; and 4) Be challenged to do great things for God.

There are a lot of excitingthings coming up quickly:  Lynn Westafer will be leading worship and singing for us this Sunday; the “Love and Respect” video marriage seminar with Dr. Emerson Eggerichs coming in May, Bible Beach Club in June…  There are plenty of ways you can volunteer to share the love of Jesus with our community through outreach!

Thank you for the expressions of sympathy and condolences on the death of my Aunt Helen.  Her funeral was an incredible celebration of the life of a true saint of God.  Thanks for your prayers for safe travel on my trip to Nashville.

Have a great week